Building self esteem can change your life in so many ways

Lack of self-belief and confidence blocks abundance and happiness and very often leads to frustration, resentment, procrastination, “comparisonitis”, jealousy and lack of motivation. All of these negative feelings towards yourself (low self esteem) and others keep you stuck in a loop of negative, unhelpful thoughts and feelings that prevent you from having all you really desire in life.

When we talk about self esteem, we are asking:

• How do you feel about you?
• How much do you really like and love yourself?
• Do you judge yourself on what others think about you?

Investing in yourself and really working to build your self esteem can change so much in your life. Low self-esteem can affect everything, from the way you view your career to the way you manage relationships. Building high self esteem can create so many positive changes. You will begin to take better care of yourself because you start to value yourself more. You may notice relationships improve and become more motivated, more confident, more believing in your abilities and, most importantly, feel better.

So often we judge ourselves based on what we think others think about us. This can be so damaging as it can lead us to seek approval from the opinions of others.

Do you have an inner critical voice that constantly sabotages your attempts to do what you really want?

Building your own self esteem has to come from within. Nobody can praise you like you can praise yourself. It can take effort and real commitment to change your opinion of yourself, but you definitely can.

Use your own voice to fill yourself up with praise. You don’t need to wait for others to do it for you. Tell yourself that you are capable, that you are strong and that you are significant, and you will feel and see your life change for the better. Your mind always believes what you tell it, so start right now telling yourself better things.

Be your own best friend. Speak to yourself with kindness, love and compassion. Be your own cheerleader and say to yourself, “You can do it. You are good enough.” Use your words to encourage you, not crush you.

Changing self-limiting beliefs

We pick up beliefs at a very early age and many of these self-limiting beliefs, such as “I’m not good enough, smart enough, pretty enough or interesting enough”, can hold us back. The good news is that when we recognise these unhelpful patterns of thinking and the words we say to ourselves, we can change them.

I have worked on building my own self esteem in many ways. For example, learning to turn down that critical self-talk, no longer criticising myself and instead using words of praise for things I’ve done well. I also talk to myself like I would my best friend, using kind words.

Could low self esteem be holding you back?

Below are some signs of low self esteem you may recognise in yourself:

• Lack of confidence and feeling bad about yourself.
• Feeling unlovable, awkward or incompetent.
• Feelings of rejection and disapproval even when there aren’t any.
• Sensitivity to criticism or social withdrawal.
• Hostility or excessive preoccupation with personal problems.
• Physical problems such as fatigue, insomnia and headaches.
• Difficulty speaking up and prioritising your own needs, wants and feelings.
• Not feeling deserving or capable.
• Difficulty making your own choices.

Rapid Transformational Therapy (RTT) can help build self-esteem and self-confidence. When you understand how to reprogramme your thoughts, beliefs and self-image, you may see positive changes in your inner voice, feelings and self-esteem. This can contribute to better mental health and physical health too.

For more support, explore how I help people build confidence and overcome self-doubt.